Jonathan's Badass Bachelor Party: BBQ, Paintball + Ceremony of Losing One's Nads

The cast of characters:

My brother-in-law Carlos, who is insane, was the demented SOB that planned the party. Although I had plenty of input. The guys who attended were the slime of the earth. The complete underbelly of society. My brother (Captain Jerk) and my soon-to-be-uncle-in-law (Father Costanzo), Luis "the Judge" Gonzales, my friends Tim, Joel, and Mario. Carlos brought a couple of his wacky friends, including a Japanese exchange student called James Bond who barely spoke English and turned out to be a mean shot with a splatter gun. 

The attire:

Those jerk-offs were not allowed on the van without a costume. I wore my bride-to-be's sparkle leggings, a Scottish tartan & a tuxedo top. My evening wear was inspired by a character I used to do back in my acting days. 

The activities:

BBQ breakfast, Paintball, The Ceremony of Losing One's Nads at my former bachelor pad. (It was a ceremony to give peace to my penis, one that marked the changing hands of control from myself to my wife.) Afterward, we headed to Tonga Room and to El Compadre. We ended the night at Sam's Hofbrau, as you do.

Photos by Melissa Ryan of Marble Rye.* (Check out more images from Jonathan's bachelor extravaganza here and here.)


*FYIZ: Melissa just launched a #WHYWEDTHEDESERT contest over on her site. If you're planning to get married in Joshua Tree (or might be persuaded to scrap your current plans in order to do so), she wants to take your photos for free.