Dear ESB,
I'm so happy that I have an excuse to email you. I'm having a fascinator made for my shower, as I won a custom-made hat at a derby party last year. The headpiece is being modeled after this one [see above].
I have tried on dress after dress and have been happy with NADA. All this over just a shower dress! I'm a 34D so open-backed dresses are a no-go, as I look simply pornographic without a bra. My budget is $500 max.
Any suggestions?
P.S. I think I love this dress, but I'm afraid it's too Lolita-esque, especially with the fascinator.
*****
I was all ready to say DON'T WEAR A FUCKING FASCINATOR, but am now eating my words. That shit is awesome.
SAVE IT FOR YOUR FUCKING WEDDING!
p.s. Will yours be made out of a karate belt?????? I hope I hope.
I'm pretty sure that's not the dress you want to be wearing with that fascinator, but you already know that.
ReplyDeleteone word: RAD.
ReplyDeleteESB highlighted some cool new Zara dresses last week that I immediately thought of when I saw this picture.
Though I get your concern over looking like an adult baby doll so maybe a lace dress isn't the best route....
I'm with esb: why not wear this to your wedding? Or rehearsal dinner, at least? A shower seems far too un-glamorous to waste this crazy contraption.
ReplyDeleteWild and wonderful. I'd say the main thing is to be sure and wear your hair (if possible) in a similarly baroque up-do like the model in the photo, so everything balances out. ;)
ReplyDeleteAs for dresses you might wear to the shower, how about going for metallic or grey to match the fascinator?
A tad over-budget, but nicely structured and the shape of the back even seems to match the fascinator:
http://www.theoutnet.com/product/320643
Gold rather than silver, but in your price range, made of lace, and more sophisticated than doll-like:
http://www.theoutnet.com/product/355185
is that the infamous tavi-bow? i feel like that's the tavi-bow.
ReplyDeleteThis really really really looks like a nightie. I can't get past it.
ReplyDeleteAbsolutely something fitted, with long sleeves.
ReplyDeleteI'd go with this kinda punk, black, vintage Moschino dress for $236.81. Hearts and bows.
ReplyDeletesome nice options at steven alan - floral shift in a similar shape to your lace dress, or a cute sleeveless white & gray one that looks like it would match the bow. also, i agree with something fitted, but not necessarily with long sleeves.
ReplyDeleteLW here - I have been ogling that Bianca dress for ages but they are now sold out in my size. My heart breaks. If only the other one didn't have an open back!
DeleteWill someone please wear this linen twist dress with some hard-core shoes?
ReplyDeleteBORING
DeleteI think simple dress/crazy hat is a pretty good pairing. These patterned dresses mentioned above, including the op's lace one, are all wayyyy too much with the bow.
Deletetbh I was expecting you to say "why blow your white dress load before the wedding"
ReplyDeleteOtherwise, ia, save it for your wedding! JUST DO IT. BE AWESOME.
well, yeah. obvs.
DeleteIs you hat going to be in a similar greyish color? It would look so sci-fi with something structured and colorful, like this cool orange Acne dress and some minimal sandal heels.
ReplyDeleteYES YES YES YES YES
DeleteThe color would look just wretched on me but that makes me love it even more!
Deleteorange is my power color.
DeleteYou are fabulous. Buying. THANK YOU!
DeleteDamn, that's good.
DeleteSTOP. now you're making *me* want to buy it.
DeleteIf I had a lady, I'd really want to buy it for her.
DeleteI'm obsessed with Erin Fetherston since someone else posted it here
ReplyDeleteNot even joking, I love this Maxi. With huge bewbs, could look super tent-like
Flight of Fancy dress on saaaaale
Cap sleeve wrap dress, also on sale
Is this Gatsby dress too much much-ness for a shower? Also, hate the flower so much, like the rest though
Metallic peplum sheath
BARF ON PEPLUM
Deletelove the Gatsby dress!
DeleteI wish I was attending derby parties that involved millinery give aways! This is not the Tavi bow, which was purple I think. But if you're going to wear a hat that obstructs people's vision a little, I think your wedding is a good place to do it. I agree with above people suggesting that the hat needs something minimalist, though, especially if you do the hair all big like the model did. I wonder if big hair worn down would also be sort of hot, though maybe *then* it would seem to Lolita-y. Hats also accentuate posture, so stand up straight!
ReplyDeleteI'm pretty sure you are not a 34 D. I'm a 34 D and I do not have pornographic boobs. Please get yourself properly measured, for the sake of your poor boobs.
ReplyDeleteI am a 34D and I can promise you that I (not necessarily every other 34D) cannot go braless. I'm no Kate Upton. Just trust me on this one.
DeleteI mean, I'm around a 34D and have neither pornographic boobs NOR can I go braless. But, I mean, who can go braless above a small B?
Deleteclearly some ppl are watching more porn than other ppl
Deleteporn/sag
DeleteI say go with a bright block colour dress, will compliment the bow. no need for white at the shower!
ReplyDeleteThat orange Acne dress is dead on (although I don't think everyone would look good in that color).
ReplyDeleteI would consider wearing the headpiece to a different event, though. I've never been to a shower in my life that was worthy of something that spectacular. Showers are usually just ice tea and aunts.