Morning,
So it would be hella helpful if you put together a list of duties for bridesmaids that I can use as a checklist for when I think hey, I think the current Bride in my life has some reasonable/unreasonable/crazy expectations of me.
Every time I've been a bridesmaid there hasn't been a MOH. So what things am I meant to do? The current one won't tell me what she wants, I'm meant to know.
thank you wise one.
*****
No prob.
Here's my extra special super duper list of bridesmaids duties:
1. Throw a bachelorette party (or make sure someone else does)
2. Show up at the wedding. Possibly in a dress of some kind.
Emily Senko by Alice Rosati for All Magazine via Emma Robertson
I would just add one more:
ReplyDelete3. Provide some emotional support for the bride.
The way I see it, that's really why the bridesmaids are there, so that when the bride freaks out about something stupid, there's someone to check her sanity and remind her it's all going to be ok, and no she should definitely walk down that aisle.
I agree with erinwdesign, but I'd phrase it as: be her friend the whole time, i.e. tell her when she's being an ass but also be there for her and love her - as or more important than the other duties.
ReplyDeleteWe were mushy so you didn't have to be, ESB.
DeleteI don't think this is really a 'bridesmaid duty' so much as the reason you're a bridesmaid in the first place. You can't mandate someone be a good friend, only pick people who don't suck.
Delete@christinarosetti Exactly.
DeleteBe somewhat interested in the bride's planning process. Like maybe once, say how's wedding planning going?
ReplyDeleteYeah, I really appreciated it when my bridesmaids asked about wedding planning. Mostly because it's nice to know someone else is interested and actually cares, you know? I tried not to bore them with all the details, but it was good to talk about it with someone other than my fiance or my mother.
DeleteHelp bride pee if she's wearing a crazytown dress. Run interference with any annoying persons (like if the bride has a crazytown mom).
ReplyDeleteAs a maid of honor who is currently driving herself nuts with everything she is meant to do, this accurate list made me very jealous of the bridesmaids I am playing mother hen to, haha.
ReplyDeleteKate
www.thrillofthechaise.com
I've also tended day-of issues, ideally before the bride even gets wind of them. If you see the centerpieces and know she'll freak, don't tell her. Just deal with it before she gets the chance to shit her pants.
ReplyDeleteAll brides have expected me to craft with them. I'm not saying it's reasonable, but I am saying I've had to do it multiple times now.
My bridesmaids are a law student living 8 hours away, a full-time undergrad who also works 30 hours/week, and a 15-year old. Basically all I'm asking of them is to show up, clothed, on the day of the wedding.
ReplyDeleteSomehow the 15-year-old got tasked with planning a shower for me. I will be very interested to see how this turns out.
haha! you will probably have the best shower ever. please report back.
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ReplyDeleteYes! Brilliant. Thank you.
ReplyDeletesome additional tasks could be things like:
ReplyDelete-go dress shopping with the bride
-go shopping for bridesmaid dresses
-help craft/diy
-give a toast/do a reading
-make sure the bride looks good for photos (ie say if there is salad in her teeth)
-be the first on the dancefloor and get the crowd involved
-encourage guests to sign the guest book
-take gifts/cards or show people where to put them
-help plan and attend her bridal shower if you're able to (within reason! you shouldn't spend tons of money and fly thousands of miles to go to a damn shower.)
ReplyDelete-on the day of: offer to get her water, help her put on her shoes, tell her if her eye makeup is running, run interference on crazy in-laws or wedding guests.
I feel like showers are Aunt territory.
ReplyDeleteI agree.
DeleteBut are bridesmaids expected to come to all the bride's showers? I was invited to the family-thrown shower, the friend-thrown shower and the other-side-of-the-family-thrown shower for one bride. I was one of her bridesmaids, but I didn't go to any of them because I live 4 hrs away from her. I DID help organize and attend the bachelorette party, though...
I don't think it's typical for there to be more than one shower.
DeleteI know one of my bridesmaids isn't going to make it to my [one] shower, due to being across the damn country, but sometimes I wonder if one of my other ones will bother showing up.