Dear ESB,
I'm looking for a fabulous fake diamond. My fiance proposed with an awesomely artistic wooden promise ring as a place holder because he knows how specific I can be. So I've been searching for the perfect ring and found it but I know the actual diamond will cut into our savings.
We are paying for the wedding, ourselves, putting a downpayment on a home and getting a new car in the very immediate future. I figure we can cut costs by getting a quality 2.5 - 3 carat fake and upgrade it later. So I'm looking for a fabulous fake for now that is undetectable to the naked eye and I want the OO's and Ah's to ensue.
I know that I can spot a Cubic Zirconia rainbow sparkle a mile away but not much more after that. Any advice?
Thanks in advance!
*****
Wear your AWESOME PROMISE RING until you can afford a $10,000 diamond.
Or: Spend the damn money if the OO's and Ah's are that important to you. Which, barf.
Emerald Cut Ring (pictured in bronze with sterling jewel) by Digby & Iona. The only sort of fake you'll ever catch me endorsing.
That's fabulous. It looks like a tomb stone.
ReplyDelete(also, yes. To the advice.)
ReplyDeleteAMEN.
ReplyDeleteFake is better for so many reasons- your pocket book is happier, you don't have to worry about people dying in Africa for you, and you wouldn't be supporting the ripping apart of pristine wilderness area (mining). Go with moissanite. It is man-made, but its brilliance and hardness is actually better than a diamonds.
ReplyDeletewhy on earth would you want a humongous fake ring? the wood promise ring sounds awesome, but if it's a diamond you're after here's an extremely tiny real one
ReplyDeleteORRRR get a big ass pearl
ReplyDeleteI second the suggestion for a moissanite stone, they're gorgeous.
ReplyDeletePeople don't care about your ring. They may ooh and ahh, but that's because it's expected of them (ew). Like ugly babies – everybody insists they're cute. It's impolite to say anything else... but you know they ugly.
ReplyDeleteMy now-husband didn't want to spend a lot of money on a ring he wasn't sure I'd like, and he knew I was worried about blood diamonds, so he proposed with a tungsten band that he had engraved with a special sentiment. It wasn't particularly pretty, and it confused everyone because it looked like a wedding band, not an engagement ring. The plan had been for it to be a placeholder until we got a nicer one, but I loved everything it represented: his caution and practicality, the engraving that was perfect, the fact that he knew the ring wasn't as important as the question and answer. So I never replaced it.
ReplyDeleteIf you must go for a fake, I love the history of the Herkimer "diamond" which is actually quartz.
ReplyDeleteBut I think you should go for a simple, understated REAL diamond ring. Like one of these, most are under $1,000. I imagine you would get a more authentic "ooh" or "ahh," not for the ring's size but for how precious and unique it is. Good luck!
Have you actually tried on one of those monstrosities? I had a 2 karat family diamond that I had planned to reset. I started trying on rings to see what style I wanted, but I felt like a huge ass with them on my finger. I'm pretty sure I was the only girl that got to a half karat and still asked for something smaller.
ReplyDeleteI ended up with an Art Deco half karat emerald (his birthstone, my favorite color) that is the most gorgeous thing in the world. People stop and ask me about it about once a month, if that really is that important to you. We got that shit on ebay and it cost us less than a grand.
You want Oos and Ahhs, get something different. Not a big ol cheesy diamond.
Everyone is going to know that a 2.5 or 3 carat ring is fake! Even a crappy 2.5 carat diamond will cost you at least 25k. Are you EVER going to spend 25-50k on a stone?!
ReplyDeleteIf you're gonna fake it, fake it realistically. Get a .75 to 1 carat good fake (moissanite, crystal etc.) and be done with it.
...and while you're at it, make sure your ring is made from recycled metal. Do you really want something on your finger that caused thousands of animals to lose their natural habitat, trees to be cut down en mass, clean water to be polluted and precious top soil to be eroded? There is SO much gold, silver, etc. already in circulation that can be melted down and created into a beautiful ring for you. OK, tree-hugger out.
ReplyDeleteSomeone needs to get this gorgeousness right away.
ReplyDeletemoissanite
ReplyDeleteI think the pearl idea sounds best, but that's just me (too). You have a wooden ring, something natural and beautiful, why have it associated with something fake?
ReplyDeleteYou could get a thin wooden band with a diamond inlay. Like some of these here. This is super pretty and interesting.
But really, agreed with ESB. If you must get a ring, tell us more. Are you looking for something more traditional, or antique looking for your ring? Modern? Etc. Fake ring doesn't give anyone much to work with.
@Miss Georgia she found the ring she wants. she's just looking for the fake stone to go in it.
ReplyDeleteGet yourself to emitations and have a look. I got a CZ replica of my e-ring from there for travel purposes. The setting isn't as nice as my real one, and side by side the diamond does have that depth of sparkle, but when I wear it on its own, people are stunned when I tell them that it's a fake copy. I also have a big blue ring from Carat for a laugh, and their settings are really nice quality. I have become a big fan of the odd fake here and there for guilt-free sparkle. I would suggest that carat-wise, less is definitely more: CZ looks more and more fake the larger the stone is, not just because of tackiness, but because the refractive index is higher in CZ than diamond.
ReplyDeleteIf loose stones are what you are after, there are created gem companies that sell them in bulk, and you can literally get a bag of 50 cz brilliants for about 25 bucks in some places.
Also, I went for cz over moissainite because cz, to my eye, looks closer to diamond. Moissainite looks a bit flat and doesn't have the depth or fire. Again, refractive index differences.
PS: you can get lab created loose stones from here. I haven't used them yet, but I am shopping for some created emeralds, so might soon.
ReplyDeleteHURRRR. First half of my comment understood. Idk what happened with the rest.
ReplyDeleteGreat idea! Don't forget the wedding-day botox too, you wouldn't want any real emotion to intrude when you're trying so hard to impress people.
ReplyDelete@Melissa 8:52 AM...I love that ring!
ReplyDeleteLab diamond, if you really want a cheap but real looking fake. They're compositionally diamonds, but cheap as hell because they're made in a lab. CZs will look fake eventually, but these apparently won't. And they're like $1,000 for a 2ct.
ReplyDeleteHowever I do agree with ESB that it's a little barfy to buy a fake 3 carat in the hopes that people will ogle over your diamond and assumed wealth. But whatever floats your boat!
Buy a gemstone if you want something that big. I think it's terribly shallow that you expect to buy a 2-3 ct. fake diamond and want people to think it's real.
ReplyDeleteSerious barf.
Big solitaires are the tackiest attempt to display your status. I was in line at the grocery store the other day behind these two women paying for their groceries with food stamps/EBT (no judgment - been there meeself)with the biggest rocks on their wedding rings. Fake or not, I simply don't get the necessity to wear something like that. Anonymous @ 7:38 is right - no one truly gives a shit, they just give you compliments because that's the response a rock is supposed to garner. Yuck. I kind of hate how there are such standards around what an engagement ring is supposed to look like.
ReplyDeleteI get not having the dough for a big rock. But why don't you get something pretty and quaint that's actually in your budget rather than blowing your current wad on a fake?
ReplyDeleteAnd, Oohs and Aahs over a BIG FAT fake? GROSS. You should shave your Honda emblems off and replace them with Mercedes ones while you're at it.
DO NOT set a fake diamond and think you're going to replace it with a diamond. if you're going to invest in a 20K diamond, freaking invest in a good setting to make sure that sucker doesnt fall out. WAIT.
ReplyDeletealso, if ALL YOU CARE ABOUT is carat weight, methinks you have not done enough research into diamonds.
this request makes me want to vomit. no one cares about your ring except you, and this makes me think you have some questionable ideas about what an engagement ring should mean. also, even really large REAL 5 diamond carat rings look a tad like costume jewelry. Pick out a pretty, affordable ring. if this hasn't occurred to you, go live under a rock.
ReplyDeleteI think a simple ring with a tiny diamond will look awesome !!!!www.litzybella.com
ReplyDeleteyes to the moissanite, i got one, it was much cheaper (whoo) not a blood diamond (husband worked for a charity at one time that helped fight against blood diamonds) and moissanite is a mineral originally found in a meteorite (from outer space!) how cool is that. also cool, the mossanite is almost as hard as a diamond and is MORE sparkly, if that is important to you.
ReplyDeleteI've heard good things about Diamond Nexus Labs (not cz but synthetic diamonds that emulate the process of making natural diamonds) and a 2.5 carat ring will cost you about $350
ReplyDeleteGross. It is better to be genuine than to have a fat rock. Try to really remove yourself from your family, friends, co-workers etc. After all, the longevity of your marriage will probably (hopefully) out last most of them. When you are 80 will your ring really matter? When it boils down, the guy and the wooden ring will be more precious than a stone. Get what you can afford, otherwise you are in for a lifetime of keeping up with the joneses.
ReplyDeleteso dumb. i *like* diamonds (have one, boys choice), esp. estate. but if i had picked it out myself i'd have an obscure awesome colored stone, like apatite
ReplyDelete& @tonia- why in gods name if you're concerned about ethics would you FAKE killing people & trees. lame.
@ESB, this is a joke from a reader, right? it HAS to be a joke!!
ReplyDelete@holli kristina i drive a car, too. and i have a computer. and a dishwasher. but i don't have a microwave. only republicans who hate the earth have microwaves!!!
ReplyDeleteIts not a joke.
ReplyDeleteIts a real question from me, a girl whose parents moved out to the county from the projects and always lived check to check. Everything I've had, I've always paid for myself, while trying to feel equal to my privileged friends.
I know that keeping up with the Jones's is a reflection of my insecurities but I've always dreamed of a lovely Maevona setting with a diamond you don't have to squint at.
That's all.
I guess I'm just coming to terms with letting go of the dream.
And the search for a fabulous fake from CARAT* or diamond nexus labs seemed like a way for me to hold onto the dream. But in the end I'm grateful for my fiance and the love we have.
Thanks to everyone for the feedback. I needed a reality check.
@Anon 9:40 ♥
ReplyDelete@anon 9:40, awww! i hope all your dreams come true! xoxo
ReplyDeleteI think this post is a perfect example of why I will no longer be apart of this blog's readership.
ReplyDeleteWhat does it matter if she wants a fake diamond, a real small chip or gemstone? (and honestly I think the fact that the majority of you are so set on having a "real" diamond is absurd... you have to be a damn moron to think that diamonds are rare in any sense of the word.
Regardless, especially after hearing the girls reasoning - I hope it made a couple of you feel regretful.
There is a difference in telling it like it is and just being snide and bitchy. I know it must seem cool to act nonchalant like you don't give a fuck what people think and you are going to voice your opinion regardless of the recipients feelings (especially in an online setting), but honestly it's just immaturity. I think it only takes a second glance around you to realize that "holier than thou" attitude makes the world a shitty place.
I was on the fence with the whole "wedding planning" debacle... And honestly, since ESB has really stopped writing long comments back and you rely more on the comments, I have to part ways! ESB: would love to hear more of you and less of your readers.
whoaw, Anon 11:27.. did you even read the comments? the majority of commenters were offereing suggestions (be it places she could get a fake, which are better, suggesting a smaller diamond or a big gemstone instead, etc).. so where do you get off? buh bye then.
ReplyDeleteI know it must seem cool to act nonchalant like you don't give a fuck what people think and you are going to voice your opinion regardless of the recipients feelings (especially in an online setting), but honestly it's just immaturity. I think it only takes a second glance around you to realize that "holier than thou" attitude makes the world a shitty place.
ReplyDeleteYou'd be kind to listen to what you just wrote, Anon 11:27. I miss a good internet flounce. Thanks for the lols.
I did not read the comments so i don't know if someone has suggested this already, but try diamond nexus labs. They make a diamond simulant, it is not CZ. They have a lot of variety or you can make a custom order.
ReplyDeleteNext time I will read all the comments first. :P
ReplyDeleteWhy do we care so much what people think about our rings? I just started a new job where every engaged girl in the building is rocking some serious sparkle, while I have a humble little diamond. I thought I was proud of myself and my fiance for buying a ring that was in our budget, but I have found myself feeling envious of the big rings and embarrassed of my own. Why? I wish I was too cool to care, but when I am honest, I totally care. I understand envy. I just wish I was powerful enough to overcome it. My wish for myself and for the girl who wrote in with the question is to just feel comfortable in our own skin and proud of the decisions we make. I hope that whatever you choose, whatever you do, you feel loved. Live in that love and try to push everything else away.
ReplyDeleteI have a lovely ring and the center stone is a white sapphire. I have to constantly tell people that it isn't a diamond and that my husband chose the white sapphire flanked by two tiny blue sapphires because they are my birth stones. It's natural, no blood shed and came from Montana. I think it's beautiful and until I actually saw the ring, didn't know that white sapphires existed.
ReplyDeleteTo anyone dumb enough to believe Diamond Nexus Labs makes synthetic diamonds in a fucking lab -- read the info on the site. They themselves even admit the stones are CZ. They are worth about $2 each. Google "Diamond Nexus Labs scam" and stop kidding yourselves.
ReplyDelete