Dear ESB,
So, it's not like I waited for all this to happen and then email you. Nope, it all happened yesterday. I'll start off with the fun:
SHOES
I'm wearing this dress (front, back). I'm in love with it. If possible, I'm in love with the shoes equally as much. So, our wedding venue is an art studio loft space on the top floor of a building in Washington DC. I recently discovered there is access to the roof via a ladder that looks like this. Clearly, I want pictures on the roof, there are views of the Capitol, Washington Monument, etc. But, definitely won't be walking up that ladder in heels. I found these for ladder climbing and beyond. I love them, so do my MOH and BM. Problem being, FH doesn't like them, but says I'll be gorgeous no matter what, plus, the dress covers the shoes. I'm leaning towards not getting them, advice?
GUEST LIST
I own my house, I have two roommates. One I love, one I don't. The one I don't is moving out 3 months earlier than I planned for. Which equates to nearly $2K in losses. I'm happy to have her go, but worried about money, and what that means for wedding budget (we're paying for it ourselves). I would give it a 95% chance I will not see said roommate in the 3 months between my wedding and when she moves out. Before I felt obligated to invite her. But, does this get me off the hook?
MOVING IN
So, why not have FH move in? I'm actually surprised how unopposed I am to having him move in 3 months early. But, I'm worried that my motivations for this are purely financial, which makes me think this is a bad idea. Then there's all the stuff you learn about each other when you move in, and we'd be doing that with a roommate instead (who we both love, but still). Should we just save that for marriage, or does it not really matter in the scheme of things? If he moved in, he'd live in the open room, not mine. (We're both church-going, religious, and virgins -- and intend to stay that way.) Then there's the stigma at church -- but I don't *think* I care about that too much. We both feel the same way about this, sort of unsure, sort of surprised by thinking it would be okay.
OH, and about halfway through engagement my parents told us they are getting a divorce (after 29 years) and my dad cheated on my mom. That shattered all kinds of things in my heart. Still trying to figure out what, if any, part my dad plays in the wedding. But, that's a whole other email I suppose.
*****
1. I'm more concerned about you climbing the ladder in THAT DRESS than in the heels.
2. Yes.
3. Move him in. The sooner the better. Maybe it's not ideal for you to learn all the he-throws-his-dirty-socks-on-the-floor-and-leaves-his-mustache-trimmings-in-the-sink stuff with a roommate, but better now than after you get married.
Image courtesy of Cymbeline