The following is an actual transcript from a conversation I had last night via Twitter. (Names have been changed to protect the innocent.) I've posted it here because I thought brides-to-be might find it instructive and/or reassuring.
friend: Nervous about my wedding dress. Why did I have to find the perfect $250 vintage dress today, huh?
me: @friend did you try it on?
friend: @me Nooooooooooo. But now I want to go back. This is so pathetic. I was NOT looking for a dress.
me: @friend you're not pathetic. this is normal. go try it on and get it out of your system. chances are it won't even fit.
friend: @me That is such good advice. You're a good advice giver.
Be prepared for wedding dress ambivalence to hit 3-4 months before the big day. I'm not saying you have to go try on other dresses, but it might help you love the one you've got.
Or you might buy a new one like I did. Oopsy.
This is the BEST advice. After agonizing over my dress for a month, I bought a lovely-but-returnable dress just to get one more option out of my system. I was finally able to stop second-guessing my first choice after that.
ReplyDeleteI love this post. It may help me rationalize over-spending b/c there are two dresses i am in love with that are way over budget. I've decided to see after about 5 more dress shopping experiences, if i feel the same. if so, i will have to go sell an organ to buy this dress LOL! But seriously, I do think its important to LOVE the dress... also reminding myself, its just one day :)
ReplyDeleteRelentlessBride
well this makes me feel better. i bought a beautiful simple little dress a month after we got engaged. now i keep wondering if i should try on others, or if it's even the right one... i keep wondering if i am going to regret not doing the whole big white dress thing! glad to know i'm not alone.
ReplyDeleteThis is great advice :)
ReplyDeleteOh my gosh, this is exactly what I'm going through right now. I keep thinking about my dress and whether or not it's THE one. I keep trying on my dress over and over again, and still feeling ambivalent...argh.
ReplyDeleteThis seems like a rite of passage: buy a lovely simple dress, then a few months later, want something poufier and more extravagant. I heard the average bride has something like 2.4 dresses! A friend just offered me her 'extra' dress - but I already have two of my own. The big mystery is: what is happening to all those extra dresses? Are they getting worn for another occasion? Given away? Resold? Hidden in the back of closets???
ReplyDeleteI wish I had *the answer* for you guys. But just know that you're not crazy!
ReplyDeleteElizabeth, you're right. It does seem very wasteful. My extra dress (yes, hanging in my closet) is my secret shame.
ReplyDeleteAnd what's up with two different dresses for ceremony + reception?!
The other dress is not always poofy, fancy, or expensive....
ReplyDeleteThough I'm a one dress all day girl. Dress that pretty, why would you want to take it off?
i have a jcrew loaner in the closet, a thrift store 35 dollar in my closet (gorgeous but very tiny), and the rental i shave paid good money for is at the rental place so i can't try it on. maybe good, maybe bad can't say. anyway, thanks for making me feel normal.
ReplyDelete1. Did she go back?
ReplyDelete2. Did it fit?
3. Did she buy it?
OH MY GOD. you are inside my head!!! just last night (four months before my wedding), i emailed my friend to say i was having second thoughts about my wedding dress. wow! this was a great post and great advice.
ReplyDeletehaa haa haa i feel like the entire first month of my blog is about this issue.
ReplyDeleteI had bought two vintage wedding gowns two years ago when I was single and now that I'm actually engaged I want a brand new one. Or I might even just duplicate one of the vintage ones. I think the 2.4 dress average is most accurate!
ReplyDelete